Col 3:17-4:1 says, "And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eye service, as men pleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God: And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons. Masters, give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven." 1Ti 5:1-2 Rebuke not an elder, but entreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren; The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity.”
Last week we began our series on Christian relationships with the Biblical role of husbands. This week, we will look at the Biblical role of wives. In Col 3:18 and Eph 5:22, wives are commanded to submit (Gk- be subject to; subordinate to; in obedience to) their husbands as is fit in the Lord. This means it is fitting, or proper, in The Lord’s estimation. In Genesis, we see that God created man in His image, and God saw that he needed help (my wife reminds me of this sometimes….). Eve was created to be a sufficient helper to her husband. God did not see Eve as a second class citizen or less of a person, and neither should the husband see his wife in such a way. However, she was created for a specific role - as was her husband.
A wife is to submit to her husband in everything (Eph 5:24), just as the church is to submit to Christ in everything. Of course, if the thing is immoral or in violation of God’s commands, she is not required to submit to him in that - for that is not “in the Lord”. As Christ is head of the church, so the husband is the head of the wife (Eph 5:23, 1Cor 11:1-3). This means in the same way that Jesus gives the direction and has the authority over the church, so the husband is to give direction and have authority in the marriage covenant.
A wife may say, “It is hard to submit. I want to lead”. So the husband may say, “It’s hard to have all this responsibility. I want to follow”. Both husband and wife may not always “feel” like walking in their God ordained roles, but as disciple of Jesus Christ - as the church - we do what is right, instead of what we “feel”. Will you obey Christ or not?
A wife is to reverence (respect, honor, look up to) her husband (Eph 5:33). Affairs in marriage often happen not because of a sexual problem, but because of a disrespect problem. If a wife constantly belittles, insults, and hen pecks her husband; then she may cause him to shut down emotionally and leave mentally - or even physically. I am not excusing infidelity, but I am saying there are reasons God gave the sexes specific commands.
Wives, do you like feeling like a princess? Make your husband feel like a king, and see what will happen in your marriage. A wife’s primary duty is to show affection (physically and emotionally) to her husband, love her kids, and keep a godly sanctuary called the home (Titus 2:4-5). If you think you are a “spiritual” woman, but neglect these things - you are not spiritual as far as God is concerned. It is sad how many so called spiritual Christian women don’t show respect for their husbands, don’t submit to him, don’t keep a Godly home, and don’t have a meek and quiet spirit. God’s Word is blasphemed because of it (Titus 2:5). The world mocks the true feminine Christian woman, but God adores and highly prizes her (1Peter 3:1-6) - and so does a Godly man.
I know even many Christians choke on what I am saying here, but it is the Word of God. Because it has been scoffed at and ignored, our society is in the mess that it is in. We have not gone forward, as some would have you believe. We have gone backwards. However, there is hope! Praise God for those Christian wives who cast off the lies of society, and embrace true Biblical womanhood as disciples of Jesus Christ. Praise God for those women who joyfully accept and excel in their role as their husband’s supporter, encourager, confidant, friend, and lover. Who make their man feel like a king. Who appreciate all he does. Who keep a warm, godly home for him and their children. These are the truly strong women. These are the truly wise women. These are truly women of the Word. Until next time, rejoice in the Lord!