This week, we will wrap up our series on marriage and family. We started off this series by talking about the God given roles of wives; and last week talked about the same concerning husbands. Now we’re going to look into the roles of children; as well as parents. The Creator of the universe set out the pattern for the proper order of the family in His Word, The Holy Bible. It would be wise for us to read this Word, obey this Word, and then teach this Word. The wisdom of man is foolishness to God (1Cor 1:18-31). He’s been around forever; so I believe it would benefit us to listen to what He has to say. Let’s get into The Word of God.
Eph 6:1-4 says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” (see also Col 3:20-21). Children have two primary duties according to God: 1. Obey your parents 2. Honor your parents. If a child follows these two simple rules, life is good. If not, it will not be “well with thee”.
Children having respect for their teachers, elders, authority figures, bosses, etc.; starts with them being taught respect at home. Parents, it is your responsibility to train your children. Others may be involved to a degree, but it’s ultimately your responsibility. Proverbs 22:6 tells us to train our kids in the way they should go. The word train means “dedicate”. You don’t just train once. You must be dedicated. Year in - year out. Lazy parents = rotten kids. You need to be willing to put in at least 18 years per child. If your not willing, then don’t have kids; because they are work.
Even children are known by their actions (Prov 20:11). Don’t just blow off your kid’s ungodly actions by saying, “Oh, they’re just kids. You know how they are.” Wrong. Teach them what is right, and expect them to obey. If they don’t obey, then discipline them. It’s that simple. If you love your child, you will discipline (disciple) them. If you hate your child, then you won’t (Prov 13:24, Heb 12:5-11). If you correct them, they will give you rest, delight, gladness, & rejoicing (Prov 29:17, 23:15, 27:11). If you don’t correct them, then they will give you grief, shame, and bitterness (Prov 15:20, 17:25, 29:15).
Teach your children to honor their family name. Teach them that their actions effect more people than just themselves. Teach them to have a multi-generational vision for their family. But you have to lead them. “Do as I say, not as I do” doesn’t work for long. It’s hypocritical; it makes you look foolish; and it brings bitterness towards God and His Word. Live what you say! Be an example, not just a talker.
The rod of correction will drive foolishness from a child (Prov 22:15). Don’t worry, your child won’t die from a spanking (Prov 23:13). They may sound like they’re going to (so you won't do it), but do it anyway (Prov 19:18); and do it quickly (Prov 13:24). Spanking cleanses the guilt of a child (Prov 20:30), and allows them to go on with a clear conscience. Spanking should only be done on the rear end. The mark should be left on the mind, not on the body. We’re not talking about physical abuse; we’re talking about child training. It should not be done in anger or out of frustration. It should be positive and proactive; not reactive. Don’t wait until you “blow your top” to spank your child. That’s just venting, not training.
Fathers, walk in integrity; and your children will be blessed after you (Prov 20:7). Don’t frustrate your children by always being negative. For every necessary correction, make it a point to mention two positives. Build your children up. Take time with them. Develop a relationship with them. The children in this world are in desperate need of Godly parents. Parents that care for them; that show them the way; that train them up; that prove their love by caring enough to discipline them (Prov 13:24). Commit to being that parent. Decide once and for all that as for you and your house, you’re going to serve The Lord (Josh 24:15). In Jesus Name, Amen. Until next time, rejoice in The Lord!