This week enjoy a few words from Weiss...
"When it comes to life and love, why do we believe our worst reviews?" -Carrie Bradshaw (Sex in the City)
It was late one night and I couldn't sleep. I found myself channel surfing and stumbled on an episode of "Sex in the City." It was the question itself that got my attention; "Why do we believe our worst reviews?" It's a universal question with no boundaries regarding gender, age, ethnicity or religion.
All of us at one time or another, have fallen victim to nasty rumors. We could all certainly have our fair share of story telling if given the chance. Yet, some rumors are so distructive we choose to hide them in the safest place we know; our hearts. With that said, why are we more inclined to take the bad to heart rather than reject it?
Recently a friend recommended that I read a book by Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements. It was not only a short and easy read, but thought provoking as well. Ruiz's writing is simple and to the point. I found myself several times scratching my head and agreeing with his 4 simple and logical ways in approaching life. The four agreements are as follows:
1. Be impeccable with your word.
2. Don't take anything personally.
3. Don't make assumptions.
4. Always do your best.
Sounds simple enough. Right? In regards to rumors, #2. Don't take anything personally, is the hardest one to follow; but why? Ruiz said it best when he gave this example...
'If I see you on the street and say, "Hey, you are so stupid," without knowing you, it's not about you; it's about me. If you take it personally, then perhaps you believe you are stupid. Maybe you think to yourself, "How does he know? Is he clairvoyant, or can everybody see know how stupid I am?"
You take it personally because you agree with whatever was said. As soon as you agree, the poison goes through you, and you are trapped...'
It may sound silly but think of it this way, think of a time you had worked on something with all your heart and were very proud. Now just imagine if you had shared that work with someone and their reaction was less than what you anticipated. Maybe you thought your work was fantastic and then someone made the comment, "That is ugly." Did you or would you question how you felt about your work after that person's comment? Would you be inclined to be in agreement with them? Another example, if a child has a dream of becoming a NFL football player and all he ever hears from his Dad is, "You can't block anything!" or "You'll never learn to throw that ball right!" What percent chance does that young boy have of seeing his dreams to fruition? I guess 50%. In that moment, the young boy or any of us for that matter, have a choice to be in agreement with someone elses negativity or choose to continue believing in our own dreams.
What will you choose?
Ancient Chinese proverb, "A rumor goes in one ear and out many mouths."